Wednesday, March 28, 2012

But It Ain't Even My Birthday.

Instructions on today's blog post:
1. Please review the photograph of my beautiful friend LeShay Tomlinson Boyce.
2. Next, press play on the youtube link which will play the song Mr. Nigga by Mos Def.
3. Follow the conversation/tread pasted from social media network Facebook.
4. Enjoy the email exchange between myself, and someone who's indentity will be protected--so I will call " Cowardly Passive Aggressive Slag Who's Unfunny Needs To UP HER MEDS".

My dear friend and birthday girl LeShay Boyce. 

step 2

step 3 follow this tread (*please note the Facebook user comments are NOT italicized.)

Birthday gal @LeshayTBoyce

  • Cowardly Passive Aggresive Slag Who Needs To Up Her Meds, Eric Walker, Heatherly Stephens and 10 others like this.

    • Rachel Elizabeth Neff Happy Birthday, girl!  <--well meaning, but it ain't even my birthday. Thanks though!
      20 hours ago ·

    • Inda Jo Conway Hope you have had an amazing day!! <---aww this is funny. thanks!
      18 hours ago ·

    • Philippe Coicou happy birthday Darling  <---oh wow, they really think that's me in the picture!
      13 hours ago ·

    • Cowardly Passive Aggresive Slag Who Needs To Up Her Meds  HAPPY NATAL DAY, NIGGA!!!!:)
      about an hour ago ·       <<<<<--------------------- ???????? Wait, what?
      See that there? That last facebook comment? Hope you're still listening to Mos Def.

      Happy. Natal. Day. Nigga. smiley faces. 
      A comment written by _______ ________.
      Okay possum, the game isn't quite over. So see if you can dig this plot. Yesterday I celebrated my sister LeShay's solar return. My good friends and I had a leisure afternoon filled with hugs, kisses, laughter and of course cocktails. We were a group of ladies that lunched. I snap a candid photo of LeShay and posted it to Facebook. Now if you look quickly and don't pay close attention, you may think that the woman in the picture is Me, J. Nicole Brooks. It isn't--as a matter of fact, I had a caption that said "the birthday girl LeShay T. Boyce." Still, people thought it was me...and after a few false birthday texts and tweets I thought it prudent to set the record straight. I appreciated the birthday love, but my born day isn't for another couple of months. Earlier this afternoon I logged on to say "hey guys, that's not's my pal" I noticed a comment from a woman--a white woman who I know that gave me a birthday salutation: HAPPY NATAL DAY NIGGA.
      See that? It's right above, look again.

      I. Was. OUT. DONE. Here it is 1pm on a busy and sober afternoon for me--and this child goes calling me a Nigga. 

      *Sips tea. Now some of you hip cats understand that Docta Slick is a persona. She is NOT all that I am. That name is a play on being a doctor--it's a nom de guerre...a pen name...a moniker...I happen to like the nigname. Oops, did I just say Nig. Short for nigger? Hmm lets see. What if I did just call myself a nigger? Should that open the flood gates for other people (black and white) to call me that? I don't know--because that's not a word I use to describe myself. Vera Brooks and William Webster gave birth to De Anna Nicole Josephine Brooks. Not Nigga De Anna Nicole Josephine Nigga Brooks.

      HAPPY NATAL DAY NIGGA! :))))))))

      So, I called her on it. Literally, I grabbed my iPhone and called this woman. I calmly and sternly told her, I did not like her comment--I was deeply offended and infuriated by it, and did not appreciate it. 
      "Oh sweetie it was a joke, if you're offended I'll take it down."

      She then went on to tell me that it was intended in humor and it wasn't serious.  She also told me that based on my blog and Facebook postings, she thought it was cool. Her wish, was my command apparently. I balked at her sorry ass reply--she then went on to say that "based on what I put out there, I thought you would think it funny. But now we're having a dialouge."

      Diaglouge? NO mothafucka, this is a monologue. This AIN'T conlict resolution like we're on the floor of the fucking U.N. You don't want to deal with what you've done. I don't even fuck around like that on my blog. If I use the word, it is pointed--I don't use it to endear people--especially white people to me. Given this past few weeks temparture regarding racial relations in the United States I find her "joke" asinine. Deleterious. Noisome. And just plain FUCKING stupid. I did my best to keep my cool. I let her ramble out her words, I said mine. It all shifted when she said "I'm not going to be beatdown in this conversation because you're offended." To which I replied: If you don't want a beatdown, then we'd better end this conversation.


      My blood was boiling--hell, it still is. As I told her, you dropped that fucking "joke" into my lap and what I am supposed to do with it now?  As much as I despised her in that moment, I wasn't willing to engage in a back and forth. So I promptly blocked her on Facebook--because frankly, what kind of friend does that? Missy Poo didn't like that one bit. And I'll show you why, in the next posting.



Anonymous said...

All very interesting..WE will rap on it when I get in town!

Docta Slick said...

right on.