Thursday, February 4, 2010

How to Walk the Red Carpet When Yo Draws Are Caught Deep In Yo Ass.

Ciao fuckers!!

Happy Thursday! Wow, I can remember once upon a time ago Thursdays meant the world to me. Nevermind the ticket I just got for expired tags on my car (thanks LADOT. Now I will contribute 300.00 to your Policeman's Ball) the gray skies here in SoCal (shuddup you midwesterners! We know it ain't cold, but we get sad when there's no sun okay?), yet another day of NOT getting my unemployment insurance, or being 4 days late on rent. Nevermind that bullshit.

Remember when Thursdays meant "oh snap! get the Jiffy Pop pop, because The Cosby Show is coming on! Followed by A Different World??? Shid, life couldn't be any easier.

That was then and this is now. Marriage equality is still left to an elite club of straight people for the most part. Listen I love gay men. In fact, I hope to marry one. I'm certain we'll have a chic bungalow in West Hollywood, he'll have lots of money, I'll have a huge allowance to shop, and I don't have to have sex with him? AWESOME.

Don't Ask Don't Tell is ruffling feathers---okay by now you know I'm a friend of the gays. This shit is stupid. There are openly gay fighters in both the British and Israeli armies. And ion't know about you, I would NOT fuck with those Israeli's. If you think all Jewish people are neurotic little pipsqueaks like Woody Allen. Think again...

But like any typical American, I enjoy---no I welcome all distractions from the news and the world at large. I prefer to guzzle down frappamochalattes, work out, and watch gross celebrities and their dilapidated facial surgeries.

Oh speaking of dilapidated celebs---Check out Mme. Slick and her Red Carpet Event for Hollywood Heart. The "stars" (hahahah) of a new documentary called "I Heart Hollywood" held a benefit for this organization, raising awareness for HIV/AIDS for at risk youths.

I myself rocked Dries Van Noten jewels, Loefller Randall pumps and a sleek dress by
H&M. I slapped on some lashes, smackled on make up and was happy with the look I pulled off. My Spanx and good Chantelle bra held it all together underneath. Enjoy the video will post later...It may be a bit dark...but I suspect that's because there were a lot of Blacks and Mexicans there last night. Oh and One Puerto Rican.


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